So Much Wrong

Chocolate Caramel Liege Waffles

“Chocolate Liege Waffles with Caramel Sauce” from Bakingdom

I guess this is the unofficial week of “So Wrong: Foods that make you ache for them in all the wrong places” because I can literally feel myself gaining weight just looking at this photo. In the real world where this food is in existence and I can eat it… I’m totally eating it. I’m not going to pass this sort of good – ahem – wrongness up for a few extra calories I can work off later. And yes, I’m aware my overly simplistic logic is way off on what it would take to work off that many calories but just HUSH! I’m enjoying this moment…


Because There Isn’t Enough Meditation In the Universe


What breakfast could have looked like but definitely didn’t. (Image from Jelanie)

Every week our department has a regularly scheduled staff meeting. Since we are a religious institution it would make sense that we would start off our day and meeting off with a devotional and prayer but sometimes it feels a bit odd to me.

I know that many of my friends grew up in homes where the family would sit every evening and do something like that together. I have family that does it every night with singing and also some family where the paternal figure presides over his family in a show of blatant I’m not sure what to call it and there is singing and praying and subjugation and all that sort of stuff just never really worked for me. My parents never did anything like that when I was growing up so I still find it a little weird sharing religious feelings so open and blatantly. I’m pretty sure I don’t believe in doing it too often in general. It’s all a little “Cave” like for my tastes.

So to be fair I’m the only on in the office who hasn’t yet led out in the prayer/Devotion bit so I figured I’d better just get it over with. I’ve done stuff like that before and I hate to say it this way but I know how to fake it and/or make it so obscure no one will bother asking me to do it again. I’ve already made some enemies down in the youth department when I didn’t proselytize correctly. I was all like “Be free!” and they were all like “No!”.

I said yes to doing the devotion and then promptly forgot about it until I work up this morning and was like “Oh crap!”. I had nothing and I was looking through my copy of “Lamb: or the Gospel According to Biff, Christ’s Childhood Pal” (my sort of religious reading). So….waking up was fun. And I decided that meant I should probably consider eating some breakfast. In true not-a-morning-person fashion I beat an egg to within an inch of its life and poured into a really warm pan and added feta cheese and made myself an omelette and toast sandwich. Not very exciting and I know I need to lay off the eggs or my stomach is seriously going to retaliate but it’s food and I needed some to deal with today. Luckily my dad found food gods-knows-where and lunch was covered. When I saw the omelette picture posted above I felt sad that mine was so measly and unfulfilling. I must try harder.

So I root around in my desk when I get to work and find my rather “ancient” iPod and load up my meditation track for the devotional. I know meditation is somewhat frowned upon by our church leaders but clearly they didn’t have to send out deficiency letters to 25% of their students.

At one point in my academic career I thought it would be fun to be a psychology major. I was all into it too. I had the classes and I hung out with the teachers. I even went to conferences and all that. I like the conferences part but not the rest so I switched to engineering. Clearly that didn’t last too much longer than the math classes but it was fun too. I encourage my students to be flexible because they say that our generation will go through an average of 2-5 career changes in our lifetime. If you aren’t prepared for that you are just in big trouble. And out universities aren’t doing a great job of preparing students these days either so… well yeah good luck folks!

Tuesdays are supposed to be fun. Sure only 5 students will show up to class but hey, a whopping 50% is fantastic around here! But it was when I attempted to go through my original routine of closing my door and having lunch that everything just went horribly horribly wrong. First there was one student who decided that last email with the word “probation” in large bold letters was a serious issue. Then, in the middle of meeting with that one there was a student interrupting. Then, there was a full waiting room of students who had missed the first meeting deadline but had apparently gotten the most threatening email and thought they might want to deal with that.

I don’t mind working with students who need help. I worked as a tutor for years and struggling students can be incredibly inspiring. But when they sit in your chair and proceed to tell you that they don’t go to class or turn in any work and what are you going to do about it…? Well you’re going to fail. Then they will kick you out of school. Then you will be angry but I tried to help you so really the question is what are YOU going to do about it?

And I was hungry on top of all that.

And then I was late for class (the one I faux-co-teach). It doesn’t look to good when the director of a program can’t even be on time for her own class.

Today got progressively worse and that’s when I gave up on life and started looking for something sweet. Thankfully I brought some Greek yogurt that I mixed with some homemade passion fruit curd and raspberry preserves I had at home and it seems to be doing the trick.

[And my independent study student just cancelled on me (she’s one of the good ones) which means I don’t have to stop eating my yogurt yet again!]

Here are some picture of cupcakes I wish I had to be bad with right now:

Tiramisu Cupcakes

“Tiramisu Cupcakes with Raspberries” from Cioccolato Gatto (A babelfish may be required)

Chocolate Ganache Cupcakes

“Chocolate Ganache Cupcakes” from The Fauxmartha

Chocolate Buttermilk Cupcakes with Earl Grey Buttercream & Salted Caramel

“Chocolate Buttermilk Cupcakes with Earl Grey Buttercream & Salted Caramel” from Raspberri Cupcakes


How Much For The Night?

After I graduated with my BA I went out of the country for a short time then came back to do some work for the university’s new summer program. The work wasn’t great and neither were most of the students but with the rest of my family in China and Indonesia for the summer it meant that I had the house to myself. My family has been described from “energetic” (the nice way of putting it) to “This is too much, I’m leaving” (the other nice way of putting it) when we’re all trying to cook in our kitchen.

Our kitchen isn’t as small or poorly laid out as some I’ve seen or worked in but it is a bit of a challenge when there are four people in it trying to do their own thing while supposedly “helping”. Having the kitchen to myself for a summer was pure bliss. The day after my parents had left for the summer, and before I had left for my trip, I had completely cleared out the fridge and freezer of anything I didn’t want in there and also cleaned every surface on the main floor in preparation for my moving out of my stuffy and hot room upstairs and taking over the rest of the house for the summer.

I like music while I cook so I set up my computer on the breakfast bar with a set of massive speakers and created a shelf on the counter for all my cookbooks. One of the cookbooks I was looking most forward to trying was this one:

Blissful Brownies

I’m pretty sure my mom got me this book as a gift, probably for my birthday which would explain how I had gone all the way until summer without trying anything in it. After doing my senior thesis on Derrida and “Robot Visions” my brain was ready for a little R&R.

Robot Visions – by Isaac Asimov

I started spending my lunch breaks down in the English department with the great Overmistress of the basement and the other assistant in the program drinking tea or coffee with some baked good or other and having a good giggle or sigh over the work of the day.

One day I brought in these:

Caramel Chocolate Shortbread

It was pure evil and it was oh so good. We also decided it’s street name was “Homemade Twix”.

After sharing it around that summer and beyond I found that favors could be bought with the promise of a batch of Homemade Twix and that it could also be made into a pie dish. I’ve gotten rides, help with events, and several other favors with these immoral treats and I think it only fair that those who can bake them also be allowed the same privileges.

Caramel Chocolate Shortbread

As a side note, the caramel filling from this recipe can be made on its own and is amazing as a sauce or condiment to other things.