In the Land of the Sober

Bee's Knees

“Bee’s Knees” from Food & Wine

I don’t quite remember when it was that I first learned about this drink. But I was probably around 15 because I definitely remember being in a resort in Zambia at Victoria Falls when I was 16 and trying to order one and having just the worst luck because no one knew what I was talking about. Back in high school I had big dreams of becoming the very first SDA bartender. My mother very quickly squashed that plan by telling me that I could be a Christian bartender but I was getting a little too specific with the SDA thing and that it was just never going to happen. Later, in college, I learned that some of the church founders spoke out against ice cream because the process of sugar and milk melting in the stomach made alcohol. And that’s just ridiculous but goes to show why my mother was right and I decided that I should really look into some other religious options. It’s not a surprise that I had a lot of fun in chemistry lab that year.

I don’t often post drinks or alcoholic or bacon-based content because every time I do I can just feel my mom feeling disappointed in her child rearing skills in my head. But this week I think I’m in proper order. There are few things at work that make me want to just set up a bar at the front desk and tell everyone “Drinks are on me!” at lunch time but that just wouldn’t go over very well and I don’t have any of the ingredients at home because it’s hard to justify a truly full and comprehensive liquor cabinet with–you know–that mother thing. So my goal this weekend is to try and figure out a way to fulfill my youthful dream of sitting in a proper bar where the bartenders not only know what I’m talking about but who will appreciate the fine art of booze. Because I’m feeling a little parched here and all we’ve got is water and whatever caffeine I manage to sneak in. That’s right. Caffeine is decreed bad, too. We’re a bit loose on that one around here but at some of our sister institutions I’ve got family that have said their job was on the line because of potential “substance abuse”. And that’s just stupid…